Safety and Screen Time
From the time our kids are born, we try to keep them safe. For example, when our children are little and we are out by a busy road, we don’t trust that they’ll know not to run into the street. No: we hold their hand while we tell them to look both ways and watch for cars. We walk with them across the street. As they get older, we give verbal reminders and still walk with them. And finally, when they’re older and have more experience and practice, we watch and see if they can handle crossing the street. Finally, there comes a time when we can trust them to manage the dangers themselves and act accordingly.
Well…not only do we help and train our children to cross the street, but also, we train them to decide on what they wear, what to eat, and how to choose and be a good friend. And in our hyper-digital world, we also need to train our children on the digital dangers and influences in their lives. And these influences are rapidly changing!
Welcome to the age of screens…as you know, they are everywhere! They are in our homes, in our pockets, and in our classrooms. And while they can be incredibly useful tools, they can also be extremely harmful if used improperly. If left unchecked, children can easily spend hours upon hours staring at a screen with access to a world of content. In addition to wasted time and the impact on a child’s developing brain, children can easily have access to explicit content if parameters and safeguards are not in place.
So what can you do to help your children navigate a digital world while also protecting them from the dangers they may face?
Pray over the influences in your child’s life. Go to the Lord and ask for His wisdom and direction as you help your child grow and develop into a young adult.
Start early. Children have access to smartphones/screens at an early age. Set up your ground rules from the start, with a plan to have limited rules by the time they leave high school.
Monitor their screen usage. Pay attention to what they’re doing on their screens. The Bark app and Securly are two monitoring tools you can use.
Limit their screen time. Set strict rules about when and how long they can use screens and stick to them.
You own the phone/device. As more and more kids have access to connected devices, it’s also important to remind children that having a device is a privilege, not a right.
Have a contract. Require your child to sign a technology contract in exchange for a device. You can find a sample on our Tech Tools Page in the Friday @ 5:00.
Keep the lines of communication open. Your kids need to know they can talk to you when they come across something inappropriate or concerning.
Watch your child’s behavior. Smartphones and their apps are designed to be addictive. Also, the kind of content your child is viewing can make an impact on their behavior. Some “typical” pre-teen/teen behavior is normal, but be aware when your child withdrawals from you too often.
Keep up on the latest trends. You will have to do some research because trends are always changing. Right about the time adults are figuring out something “new,” kids are on to the next thing. A great resource can be asking someone in their early 20s what’s new and concerning.
Some other practical tips to develop healthy habits around screens are:
Don’t allow kids to have their devices in their bedrooms.
Have a device parking lot for when your kids have friends over.
A young child should only be allowed to use a cellphone for emergencies.
Increase minutes for each year of age and set nighttime boundaries by placing the phone out of reach of your child.
Create quiet zones by putting phones away during meals, family games, and time with friends.
Set limits on screen time and check their screen time usage.
Start your child off with a non-smartphone. This enables pictures, calls, and texts, but not access to the Internet.
You always have the right to monitor and limit usage. Check messages regularly and spontaneously.
Be on your child’s social media and email accounts - even their school Gmail account. Know their log-in information and log in as them. Often.
Be involved with what your kids are listening to, watching, and being exposed to. Hold their hand, so to speak, and help them see and understand the dangers. As they mature, let them know you’re involved and that there is accountability that helps develop trust as they grow - keep talking about the dangers. Finally, with training, support, and accountability, your child should launch into adulthood, able to make godly decisions around the choices they allow to influence their lives.
